We always forget about those groomsmen. Poor guys. Truth be told, they are some of the most helpful to me on the wedding day should anything tricky being taking place. Beer runs, moving tables, construction projects in a bind and so on…. most always smiling and even looking for something to do. I can always count on groomsmen to say ‘sure, what do you need?’
They are my secret weapon. They also give me all the high fives and ‘good jobs’ I need to sustain 12+ hours of manual labor and running around on my feet. For some reason, they are the ones that have eyes on it and actually see what I’m doing all day.
Do I ‘put them to work’? No! Do I not staff properly knowing I can just rely on them in case of emergency? Nope. But a gal never knows when 8 sets of muscles can come in handy.
That to say, how do you plan on asking your dude men to be a groomsman in your wedding? Like this is a real mystery that needs solving to me. We women have plans for this…. parties and reveals and professional photographers and hashtags and …. Shall I keep going?
But dudes… do you take them to dinner? Meet at the pub? Shoot a text? I don’t know. I think I’m asking here. Are you going to bromance it up or just go in for the kill with a straight question? Or… are you just going to tell them? “Hey, you’re in the wedding, here’s the date and the link for renting the tux, thanks man.” Am I totally being a reverse sexist here? Under-thinking what men are capable of in their relationships?
I’m sure there are a lot of ways to invite your friends to be in your wedding and I trust you’ll find the best way for you and your friends.
So I may not know much about the asking but I do have some ideas for the thanking!
Being in a wedding party is expensive y’all. Estimated at $1,500 per wedding. Attire, travel, a gift, bachelor party, travel for that and engagement parties and such… and for bridesmaids- hair, makeup, nails and so on. Adds up quickly! Maybe even childcare for a lot of them. You’ve done it, you’ve been in a wedding or two or three and you know the commitment. So what do you plan to do to show your gratitude? A gift? An experience?
My favorite of the gifts my husband got as a groomsman was a travel bag. Think, duffle meets weekender, dude style. We use it all.of.the.time. Something like this from Groovy Groomsmen Gifts is what I’m talking about.
ALL THE SAME / DIFFERENT?
A misnomer about gifts for a group is that they all have to be the same. Consider that your group consists of different personalities and interests. Handpick what is best for each guy. And even further, reduce duplicates by thinking through weddings your guys have been in… any recollection of those gifts? Give a gift you would want to have yourself. Groomsmen gifts can be so cheese. So redundant even. Don’t force it- do something genuine. The stuff I got my girls was so forced… bleh. If any of you are reading: Sorry I made you wear those awful dresses and sorry about the Austintacious nail polish. #weallmakemistakes
WHEN TO GIFT
The timing of your gift may even factor into what you give them. Maybe you order a duffel bag for everyone and have it delivered to their home prior to packing for the bachelor party. I mean, I know that guys like to be all matchy matchy and all. Or maybe you get Whiskey rocks and present them during a Whiskey tasting at your bachelor party. Maybe, if while getting ready, you provide cuff links and tie clips for everyone.
If you just aren’t into stuff, no sweat. Other ideas I think are neat and unique are donations to organizations that mean something to each person. Experiences are becoming popular as well. So a day on the golf course or sky diving could be cool.
This can be easily overthought and add stress to wedding planning. Don’t let it be a burden. Make it fun. Ask around at work, ‘what are gifts you’ve gotten that you’ve loved and what are some you’ve hated?’ Dig around on Pinterest, you may have to have your bride help you with this, or just keep on perusing the Groovy Groomsmen Gifts page I mentioned. You can’t go wrong with the hundreds of options you’ll find there.
Until next time,