I’m often asked my opinion about doing video and I have to remind couples that it’s all relative. I don’t have the answer on how many times you may or may not watch it. Some really may watch it all the time and others, rarely, if only ever the one time. Will you have a little girl that will play dress up in mommy’s gown while watching daddy kiss mommy on video? I just really don’t know.Read More
Unfortunately, having the wrong expectations can really derail a wedding day. It's tricky to navigate so I want to share a few common things I see, which you can easily get on track once recognizing.Read More
In an ideal world, what would you choose for your relationship… conflict resolution or conflict management?
I feel like America throws “resolution” into the ring and binges on popcorn and coke while watching it get beat like a dead horse. We push and push for something that just doesn’t or can’t always happen. In all reality, I actually think we avoid conflict. But when we are knee deep, we do long for resolution.
In our home, I may never get used to John’s sudden sense of urgency over something extremely random and I can assure you that he is a bit over rescuing me from lost keys. But these things are not going to change so why fight about them over and over, seeking complete extinction of behaviors we don’t like in the other? We’ve recognized that while some things can be resolved, others are simply best to just manage.
I think we tend to get our panties in a wad on this resolution thing. Granted, random senses of urgency and lost keys are small fruit compared to the big guns but the point is that we get so worked up over conflict that we can’t just walk through it. One party demands it never happen again and the other just shuts down. So inevitably, it does happen again and the separation of thought grows with deeper darkness each time.
There are some important things to consider here. Just so we are clear, I’m not encouraging anyone to walk through an unsafe storm. Being mistreated is grounds for deeper conversation. I’m talking “every day”, “don’t even know what we are yelling about”, “you didn’t fold the laundry and now it’s wrinkled” kind of distractions that drag us down. With that in mind, what do we do with the mess of it? There are a few options but we will focus on these:
1. Decide if it’s a battle worth picking. If not, then call a spade a spade, remind each other you’re ultimately on the same team and take a “time-out” to cool off. If yes, go to step two.
2. Here, in step two, you get to talk about it after cooling off.
When discussing, focus on the emotion, not the action. The action is likely less of an issue than the feeling it sparks. For me, I can feel disrespected by things based on a root issue. An action can trigger an issue and I'll go into a confusing frenzy because really, what he did wasn't all that big of a deal.
If it’s true that opposites attract, we will always find things to disagree about and that is okay. With our differences comes opportunity for growth and learning about things beyond our own perspective. Find the good in your differences and lean into conflict. Don’t be scared to disagree. We are so much healthier when we just simply agree to disagree. Sure, there are things that really need a team consensus. But if at the end of the day, the topic doesn’t impact the bigger picture, let it go.
Sometimes, the best way to salvage a bad day is to manage the moment rather than pushing to solve the world's problems.
Apologizing requires making a choice but having some strategies can help! Pride comes before the fall but our goal is to avoid that fall. Let's chat!Read More
So you want the best wedding singer that money can buy? Awesome. Here are some things you need to consider when you are talking to different bands, especially in relation to the venue you have booked. Any oversight in these items could alter your wedding budget or cause conflicts in your wedding day timeline. All of these things should be in band contracts but their importance is often lost on couples that haven’t done this before. That’s okay, I’m here to help with that. Here are six things to consider when hiring a wedding band.Read More
Each year, we reflect on trends of the year before and awe at what is to come. 2017 has me particularly excited. I had the pleasure of attending Wedding MBA in the fall and according to WPIC, these are the trends that are going to get all of your Instagram hearts and comments.Read More
Having had a few very young couples this year, I'm seeing the advantage they have going into marriage that some of us may not have had! Anna and Benjamin make this list and I wish them many years of fulfillment!.Read More
The combination of feeling equipped in my own marriage and having a unique audience of engaged couples has given me passion to speak about relationships! I want to talk about avoiding the pitfalls of engagement. I also want to present tools and resources that allow my couples to have open conversation and successful marriages. I think you all have known for a long time that I may plan weddings but it's always been about much more to me.Read More
Groomsmen gifts don't have to be cheese. Or forced! Or even the same for each guy.Read More
Who cares what your budget is.... your wedding will be awesome no matter the price tag! Don't let anyone tell you it can't be awesome. Sure, you may have to adjust that champagne taste on a beer budget but whatever, isn't craft beer all the rage these days anyway???
Today, I share about my wedding (on a lower budget) and the compromises I made to make that work.Read More
It's about attitude, not money. Come over and have some real talk with me. By now, you've learned I say what no one else is willing to say. It's a gut check, but it will save your relationships and sanity.Read More
Your wedding should most definitely be the best day of your life but alcohol can ruin it pretty quickly. Today, I'm sharing my experience and advice on how to approach this responsibly without killing all the fun of the day. There is a reason the State of Texas has laws around this, a 'why' behind your venue putting their foot down and context on why your catering / bartenders are doing what they do. No one is a jerk here. We want the best for you. So listen up!Read More
There is a lot of information out there and it can be really overwhelming. Whether you think it's a sales pitch or not, the truth of the matter is that you need a leader. My wedding day was nuts! I was a corporate event planner and I thought I had it under control. I'm now a professional wedding planner to help other sweet souls avoid the train wreck of stress that I experienced.Read More
Deciding on doing a First Look or not can be a really emotional decision and no one should pressure you either way. There are some things to consider so join me as guest blogger, Justin Douglas, shares his perspective on the pros and cons.
*Photo credit for all images: Justin Douglas PhotographyRead More
Why is your vendor a jerk? Well, they likely aren't but I totally get why it can feel that way sometimes. Let's talk about what may be going on and then go over your feelings and how to address them!Read More
When good people find love, and focus on their marriage, they truly have the best day ever. Laura + Garth lived their dream day in the rolling Hill Country of Texas by saying their vows at Ma Maison and the rest is history!Read More
I love my dude and for a fun take on #introductionfriday, I thought I would share the beginning of my forever. I love being apart of yours and enjoyed reflecting on mine. :)Read More
As a wedding planner AND a mom.... weddings are no place for children!Read More
I love real weddings and need to be better at blogging them! Here is an attempt for one of our sweet spring couples.Read More
The healthy bride is a the one that feels good in her skin because she eats well, is active and loves herself through the ups and downs.Read More